The Power of Positive Self-Talk
Do you ever tell yourself that you are not good enough? Or that you are not capable? Or that you will never be successful? These self limiting beliefs have the unfortunate power to manifest themselves into our reality. When this happens we find ourselves unable to show up with confidence, feel true happiness or worse yet, achieve our goals. The solution to this negative thought loop is simple, replace it with the power of positive self talk.
So what is positive self talk anyway?
Positive self talk is the little voice of optimism that lives inside of your head. It is the voice that tells you that you are worthy and wonderful. It is what brings joy and happiness into your life and what sparks all of the self confidence that you have within yourself. The problem that so many people face is that this little voice of positivity is often overshadowed by constant negative thoughts and self limiting beliefs. The key to changing your mindset is learning how to give your voice of optimism greater power. You want to make that voice so powerful that the negative talk centers of your brain have no option but to retreat and quiet themselves.
So how do we change our self talk?
The first step in changing our internal dialogue is to recognize and identify the specific negative thought patterns that plague us. These negative thought patterns generally fall into four distinct categories: personalizing, magnifying, catastrophizing and polarizing.
When we personalize our thoughts we are essentially blaming ourselves for everything that can go wrong. Magnifying means that we are focusing entirely on all of the negative things that can happen while ignoring all of the positives in any given situation. When we catastrophize we are constantly expecting the worst to happen to us regardless of any logic to the contrary. Lastly, polarizing thoughts is to view events, situations and life in general as falling into two extremes with no middle ground. Everything is seen as very black and white and every situation that we encounter is straightforward with no room for another perspective.
The problem with these types of negative thought patterns is that we are hindered from seeing the positive in any given situation and over time, we begin to actually believe that we aren’t good enough. Thus, these negative thoughts become a self fulfilling prophecy. The key is to replace these old patterns of internal dialogue with new ones.
Try reframing your negative thoughts with gentler, more positive ones. For example:
I am a complete failure. —> I am proud of myself for trying, that took so much courage.
I am so overweight that I don’t know why I even bother trying to lose weight. —> I am strong and I want to get healthier for myself.
I’ve never done this before and I will be awful at it. —> This is a great opportunity for me to grow and learn something new.
There is no way this will work. —> I will give it my all to find ways to make this happen.
There are many other useful strategies for reframing your thought patterns. One very easy strategy is to surround yourself with other happy, positive people. After all, you are the company that you keep. Take a moment throughout your day to check in with yourself. What are some of the thoughts swirling around in your head? Are those thoughts serving you well or bringing you down? If the latter is the case, take the opportunity to practice replacing those negative thought patterns as mentioned above.
The old adage that laughter is the best medicine still holds true. It is very hard to be negative when you are laughing so go ahead and read a funny book, listen to a comedic podcast or watch a silly movie. This is a great way to distract your brain and shift your thinking. Lastly, try using daily positive affirmations. Pick a few that resonate with you and post them everywhere. Stick a note on your mirror, on the fridge, in the car or even pack a little positive affirmation note into your lunch bag. The more you repeat these affirmations to yourself the faster you can retrain your brain to think in a more productive and positive way.
Everyone has the ability to be more thoughtful with the ways in which they speak to themselves, it is all about replacing those negative thought patterns that do not serve us with positive thought patterns that do. Try shifting your internal dialogue and see how much better you begin to feel about yourself. Get ready for that self confidence to soar!
